Imagine that you have this friend. Your best friend. A friend who has been through everything with you in life, all of your ups and downs.
Now at times you think this friend is great! Who would you be without this friend? There is just one little thing though about this friend that drives you crazy. He or she just lives to criticize you.
They remind you of every embarrassing thing you have ever done, every mistake that you have ever made. They can make you feel guilty, jealous, and angry like no one else on the planet can. They tell you that you will never be more than you are now. That you should just be grateful for what you have because what makes you think that you are so special and entitled to anything more? They tell you to get real. That you will never get that dream girl or guy, they are way out of your league. They say you will never get that promotion because you are just not smart enough. On and on they go everyday telling you what you cannot be, have or do.
Now you might be thinking, who on Earth would want a friend like that?
The answer is you if you are still letting that pesky thing called Ego run your life. Read the above statements again and see if that “friend” sounds familiar to you.
We originally created the Ego to help us stay focused on our own unique experiences while on Earth. Because we are in fact All One, we needed a sort of tuner to help keep us focused on our own station and have a way to “tune out” all the other traffic out there. Otherwise we would just be hearing all the other gibberish from all the other parts of ourselves (the millions of other people on our planet right now).
The problem however began when we started giving that Ego too much power and mistakenly started to believe that the tuner was in fact our “identity”. When we started to believe everything it told us was truth. Our next mistake was in believing that everything that has happened up in our lives until today has now defined who we are going to be tomorrow. Another trick of that pesky Ego. It has now established our identity and it doesn’t want to give it up easily. It likes itself just where it is. It feels safe and easy…even if you are miserable.
So now when you say “I’m going to lose weight and get in shape over the next few months“ the Ego says “Uh. Uh, Uhhhh. No we are not. I am comfortable here. I don’t like change. We have now established ourselves as a “slightly overweight person” and I don’t feel comfortable changing that label.” And then it goes into a whole bunch of reasons why you won’t be able to do it. It will tell you things like “You’ve tried it a million times before and it’s never worked so why even bother.” Or “you’re never going to find time to go to the gym a couple of times a week.” or “Eating food that is good for you is boring” or any of the one million things it will try to come up with. I am sure you can fill in any blanks from your own pesky little voice. So now…what do you do?
You need to shake that little sucker up. Throw it off its tracks. Shock the heck out of it!
How do you do this?
You focus on the moment of NOW!
You see, the Ego can only survive on the past. All of the criticism, guilt, negative talk and thoughts all stem from things that it has made connections with from your past. If you choose to live in this NOW moment there is nothing for it to feed off of anymore.
You can be a new person as of this MOMENT. It does not matter a lick what happened in your childhood, or past relationships. It doesn’t matter how many mistakes you have made or how many failures you have had. That is in the Past. It’s over. There is nothing that can be done about any of that. All that matters is right NOW. This moment. Right NOW you can be anything you want to be! And there is no one to tell you differently.
So what is the exercise?
Grab a pad or open a fresh page on your word processor.
Imagine that you just arrived on this Earth for the first time this morning. You have absolutely no preconceived notions about anything. Everything around you is fresh and new. You are amazed at all the unbelievable experiences you can have while you here on this planet. It is like the biggest playground you have ever seen! Write down all your impressions. Even the smallest thing. Imagine you were writing someone “back home” and explaining all of the wonderful things down here on this planet there are to experience.
Tell them about the food! You discover there are at least 25 different places you can eat with hundreds of food choices within blocks of you. Tell them about the people! There are so many you can meet, have fun with, laugh with, share things with. Tell them about all the millions of ways people have to make money while they are here. Explain how you can’t imagine anyone not being able to earn a fantastic living while here doing something they love because there are just so many options! How about where you live? Explain how cool your house and apartment are. Explain about cell phones, televisions, computers, etc.
For the next few days keep acting like everything you see around you is brand new Everything is possible for you because “you have never tried them before”. And if that pesky ego tries to thwart your fun be sure to say to it “I don’t know who you are or where you get your pessimistic ideas little fellow but I know that I am entitled to experience every good thing down here just be being here. So I think you better move on and find someone to tell your silly fantasies to.
You will be amazed at how differently you will see the world and all of your possibilities when you look at them with fresh eyes.
Happy Creating!
Janeen Clark is a Spiritual Life Coach who has been teaching, studying and applying the Law of Attraction for over 15 years. If you would like more fun ways to use LOA visit her website at http://www.theveryhappyhuman.com
Mimics and gestures can tell much
Hopefully you can see how important nonverbal communication is. Some sources say that it may be 78 percents of communication between people. In other words, nonverbal communication may be the most important part of communicating with other people.
Actually, your success in relations with the opposite sex depends on your abilities to understand the signals sent by your partner. If you interpret them in a right way, you can send your own appropriate signals to him and behave tactically. If you want to figure someone out, it's better to combine that person's words and gestures when analysing a situation. When the words of your opponent contradict his gestures, you better trust the motions.
It's worth mentioning that Russian brides possess a larger spectrum of refined ways to attract attention and manipulate men. Besides, alluring gestures, long stares and adjusting hair or clothes are common for both sexes. For example, blushing cheeks and dilated pupils show person's excitement. If you want to have a complete understanding between you and your partner, you can conciliate him in a fast and simple way by copying his pose and reflecting his gestures. Do it gradually, but only you feel yourself comfortable enough.
In case of long-distance relationship, guys want to know how to behave while meeting their ladies after the long months of correspondence over the Internet. Behaving correctly in such situations is crucial. So, here's one tip that will help you understand if your female partner is sexually attracted to you.
Scientists say, before two people decide if they need or want each other, their chemistry on subconscious level has already known it from the first moment of their face-to-face meeting. Every person has intimate or private space with the radius of 50 centimeters. If you want to check whether a girl likes you or not, try to get closer to her breaking this limit and step back after a few seconds. Then watch her reaction. If a woman feels free, relaxed, comfortable and allows you to enter her territory, it's a signal that you can get closer to her. And vice verse, if she's nervous, irritated and tries to get back from you, it means she's not ready for a close relationship with you. All this happens on a subconscious level so she'll never notice that you're testing her. She may even have not understood yet, if she likes or dislikes the person.
Also, when a female is interested in the opposite sex, she involuntarily puts her feet a bit broader than usual. Even if she's in a company of several men, no matter if she's sitting or standing, her toes will be always directed towards a man she's interested in. Crossed legs always show emotional dissatisfaction, though sometimes a woman does so if she is highly sexually excited. That's why you should follow her mimicry and eyes as well.
By the way, Russian women are about 1000 times more sensible to different smells than men. So, if some odor is nice and gentle for them, it can greatly increase their sexual desire. If you want to attract a girl, use some good toilet water, but not too strong, before seeing the lady of your dream. The next steps will depend from your first experience and meeting.
For most guys, traveling to a girls' home-country is a life altering decision, as many men may find it hard to choose their partner without actually meeting in person. So, it's utterly normal to take a "private tour" and meet several ladies. Most girls will understand such a course of action; Nevertheless, some may find offensive to know that there is competition.
Oksana Boichenko
OksanaLove, Inc.
http://www.oksanalove.com
The matchmaker with 12 years of experience in the online dating business. You can find your second half – just visit our dating site and meet your Russian bride among the thousands of beautiful Russian women.
The Importance Of Knowing Yourself
Knowing yourself is a very important task that one has to undertake and the most challenging as well. When one knows who he is and clearly understands what he wants, then he has a better option of discovering how to reach his own success, personal fulfillment and happiness.
Knowing one’s true and inner self will be of great help in working to reach one’s goals more effectively. It will guide one through the path to success. It will transport one to such calmness so to improve one’s attitude as well as one’s relationships and connections with others.
Psychologists devote their time helping individuals see and understand things within their inner self which they have long been suppressing from their own selves. This is natural, as people are skilled at such hiding games. Often, when one does not wish cope with a certain circumstance or situation, one denies that it had transpired, or translate it so to fit another different perception of the world.
Knowing yourself consequently, empowers and enables you to create different choices.
Success easily comes to those with pleasing personalities. However, this does not necessarily mean that one needs do what everyone wishes; rather, acquire a positive attitude of being respectful to the opinion of others at the same time remaining true to one’s own beliefs.
Don't expect to suddenly go on a certain course and immediately become aware and know yourself. This is a voyage where one can board and allow it to transform one’s life, for the better. The success of such journey depends deeply on how bravely you face yourself; on the way, you might discover certain things that you do not like and possibly opt to hide or deny it. Be strong and accept those negative things because it is only by accepting your faults can you truly change for the better.
Be open to accept and listen to the opinion of others, eager and willing to learn. Changing your judgment and views on account of more reliable facts is not a sign of weakness but of strength in your character. Always be inclined to offer help, be caring and polite but do not forget to keep your own personality.
The basic principle of knowing yourself is that every individual is responsible, in control and generate their own life encounter. This is a process very much complex that may be severely obstructed when one is unconscious of how one functions, or if one has a misunderstanding of thyself.
Rationalizations are used by many to give justifiable explanation for their actions. One can pretend that the problem is to be blamed on the other person. This is known as projection.
You therefore need to discover and improve your true person and not what others perceive you to be, and also not who you believe you must be, but the person that you truly are. How you manage your life, guide others, take charge, perform and behave in relationships really depends on how effectively you use your strengths and identify your weaknesses that you will discover when you truly know your "self."
Understand how you could guard yourself against responses triggered by emotions. You are vulnerable to miscalculation of judgment should you permit your emotions to interfere. Indeed, everything that one does is based on one’s emotions, but angry or careless emotions does not have a place when it comes to decision making. Take control of your emotions and delay conclusions, decisions and choices when in a very emotional state.
Develop enthusiasm in yourself. Enthusiasm draws good relationships and success. It is that positive outlook that radiates on you that individuals like dealing with. Your positive and enthusiastic outlook will contaminate and encourage those around you to also be enthusiastic and positive, therefore become cooperative.
Also, be ready to face unreasonable and negative people and never let them destroy you. Stay reasonable and calm.
Knowing yourself will enable you to develop your full potential and be happy, contented and fulfilled. Whether one’s idea and understanding of success speaks about fulfillment in business, friendship, love, sports, a blend of all these or another thing altogether, knowing yourself and working on to change for the better will enable you to achieve your goals. Then when you reach your goals, indeed you will turn out to be a much happier person. And that is success in its truest sense.
Markeith Williams is a personal coach and business owner. He is the CEO of River Sity Allince Inc, and give lectures around the world.
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