I have a former colleague who I resent a lot, even to the extent of wishing bad things will happen to him. I know this is very bad yet the circumstances are really unforgiving to me because he as a very powerful figure who backs him at my previous workplace. I'm not sure why we couldn't develop a fruitful working relationship. Maybe I have some problems which I can't realise myself?
About 1 year later, I resigned from that company and was extremely glad to see the back of that building. The resentment still lingers, as we are both highly competitive. This is certainly no gentleman agreement between us. We just went all out to impress the top boss with our drawings.
So here I am, reading about Maria Duval's guide for forgiveness and getting rid of resentment in my calm and relaxed study room overlooking some lush greenery.
I whisper to myself: "I forgive Mr Txxxxxxxn, and I forgive you for taking away my work" (I won't write out the real reason here, of course)
So now, I will do my best to repeat this proclaimation at least 2 to 3 times a week until I've totally feel at ease towards this experience. Maria tells me once I have achieved a sense of re-established harmony and goodwill, visualise Mr T. once more. He should be standing in front of me and say:
"Thank you. Now I release you."
Also, call out loud "I forgive myself for......"
Maria Duval says this method of forgiveness is very powerful. Thanks Maria.
1.9.09
Act of Forgiveness
14.8.08
Admit it's tough to forgive
A thought tells me this is a must do step. I have difficult time with this one... it is easier said than done and I confess - that is to forgive others. As I observe, it's true, in office, there are idiots who are trying to mess with me and make me fed up, or trying to be funny and not actively contributing to the work scope, or wishing I will walk into a banana skin and they laugh.. I admit I wish something bad will happen to them. This is bad spiritually. Yet I can't help but fall into it whenever such monkey business happens again. What's the point?
Accepting people you dislike into your circle of life is probably one of the toughest you can face in life. This happens usually in workplaces where there are a lot of inter-personal conflicts due to different working styles.
On my spiritual pathway, I am constantly reminded that I need to forgive each and everyone. Maybe I am their scourge in their eyes too? It's usually a both way thing.
So the next day, I happily go to office with the intention to have a peace pact but arghh.. as soon as I see those high-handed emails, my ego starts to pull my energy down and replace it with a stream of inner rage. I try not to be personal as there is really no joy bearing this kind of grudges, after all, we are fellow colleagues and countrymen. But it's hard to let go of that anger and that rage.
So do share with me any of your experience in forgiving? Even in the most difficult scenarios? I think if I don't forgive I'll never live the life I want. On the other hand, I do not wish to appear as a piece of "easy meat"....
